The quote is from Hamlet, the famous To-Be speech. Just so we are clear up front.
I have changed the tagline on my Pinterest account so it now says, “former witch, former religious person” although that isn’t in chronological order.
Chronology, the study of time. This wretched lurch from cradle to grave.
I don’t understand growing up. I thought it would be more… important.
The more I live and love and learn, the more I know this truth: the only thing important in this life are feelings like love/lust and courage and kindness and self-respect.
Side note: best part of Alanis Morrisette in concert in 1999 was her singing “You Live, You Learn” with a film running in the background filled with various ooh-ouch OMG crashes on the snowboard game you could find in movie arcades around that time.
Can’t find exactly what I experienced then, but this is close. The feeling is true.
And yes, I know a little about movie arcades during that time, because I was working at a movie theater in Tucson, Arizona in the late nineties (during my witchy cosplay years).
The job was okay, kind of. Co-workers were great. Cleaning up theaters not so much. People are so fucking gross. A story for another time.
But when Practical Magic came out and I snuck in my entire coven to see it for free?
So utterly perfect. So utterly priceless. Thank you my co-workers in crime who helped me achieve this feat. Wherever you are now, you dirty dirty dirty bungers. You are still my favorite trench buddies. And I’ve worked at Circle K a.k.a. Hell.
So… ummm… returning to what I said about love/lust, courage, kindness, self-respect.
We had most of that figured out as kids, right?
Obviously, we didn’t have the lust part until after puberty, but I had a puppy-dog crush on a boy with red hair and freckles all through elementary. I used to have dreams that he would pick me–ME!–at recess when we were playing Red Rover and all the other girls could go soak their heads. I would wake up feeling complete, even holy.
Let’s call him Tom Sawyer. I’ve met a few of them in my life. None of them have a mind that’s for rent to any god or government. Bless you, Tom. Free will and eternal rebellion!
I still have dreams of Tom now, and it’s him but it isn’t him. He’s an archetype now of youthful and innocent yearnings for affection, emotional safety and yet, freedom.
I had a dream the other night about MRME (which I knew would happen eventually).
We were at a Pacific marina. He was wearing a blue shirt that surpassed the seas, and was coiling rope with his elbow and hand. (I loved his hands). He said something about how the ocean is furious with humanity and we need to respect her before it’s too late.
Again, it was him, but it wasn’t him. I don’t even know if he has a boat.
Still, it was good advice. I pinned this onto my Science FTW board on Pinterest.
What do dreams mean? Are they everything or are they nothing?
As a girl, in church, I was taught that dreams were often sent to righteous men as a message to the world.
But not women, we didn’t get revelations, because Eve was the first to bite the apple.
Girls were there to be fucked en masse, until a suitable heir to the throne was made.
Fuck that. Or, let’s say: take it down, spit on it, trample it, douse it and let it burn.
So, let’s parse it out. I believe to some degree in the collective unconscious. I have read everything that Joseph Campbell and Clarissa Pinkola Estés has ever written. I have a fascination with fairy tales, especially the dark ones. I have written about them.
Still, the mind is that last true refuge we have against the endless encroaching of society. So I say, dream and let dream. And don’t let anyone ever step on your internal life
And this is what my mind has conjured, recently. Enjoy!
all that lives
soon must die
this world gives
just one try
if I knew
odds from ends
I’d find you
where it bends
on the bank
in the shade
luck I’ll thank
when love’s made